‘17 Again’: A Freudian fantasy land

"17 Again" (PG-13)
Grade: D
I can't believe I actually saw this movie...

Every now and then, a film comes around that is so bad it seems to send shockwaves through the entire motion picture industry. The release of such films can be catastrophic, causing viewers to flee from theaters in terror and critics to question their faith in humanity. The latest Zac Efron disaster, “17 Again,” may not fall into this category, but it just narrowly escapes.

In the film, high school basketball star Mike O’Donnell (Zac Efron) abandons his dreams of becoming a professional athlete to marry his pregnant girlfriend, Scarlet. Twenty years later, O’Donnell (played by Matthew Perry as an adult) is miserable, getting divorced and banished from his family. Through a series of strange events, O’Donnell’s body is transformed into its 17-year-old form, giving O’Donnell the opportunity to change the course of his life. However, O’Donnell has not traveled back in time, and he is merely a teenager in contemporary society, so changing his life course would mean abandoning his family completely.

The plot of “17 Again” may lead some to believe the film is suitable for all ages, but it actually functions more like a chick flick than a family film. The humor gets risqué at times, simultaneously blessing and cursing the film. While this humor may get a laugh or two from even tough critics, it pushes the film away from the realm of family entertainment, forcing the audience to hold it to the standards of more mature audiences.

It likely goes without saying that the plot of the film is predictable beyond words: O’Donnell goes to high school and realizes that his life isn’t all that bad. Go figure. However, things really get weird when the teenage O’Donnell interacts with his family, which he claims himself to be a relative of. Of course, this doesn’t stop him from hitting on his wife, nor does it stop his daughter from trying to sleep with him. It’s a big pool of incest, and Freud probably wishes he were here to bathe in it.

Aside from this filthy, pulsating pile of pending federal offenses, Mike O’Donnell is dull. In fact, cardboard cutouts of Betty Boop are more complex than he is. It’s also clear from Matthew Perry’s small role that Perry has lost all his dignity.

What single-handedly saves the film from being a nuclear holocaust of cinema is Thomas Lennon (best known for his work on Reno 911), who stars as the ultra-rich super-nerd Ned, O’Donnell’s best friend. Ned is the first to learn of O’Donnell’s transformation, and he helps O’Donnell by enrolling him in high school to get closer to his children. Throughout the film, Ned hits on the high school’s principal, coming to the school dressed in flamboyant clothes and striking poses that highlight the size of his crotch.

Unfortunately, the film becomes painful again once Lennon leaves the screen, and the viewer is left with just Efron and incest.

See “17 Again” at your own risk. This cannot be advised strongly enough.

‘The Soloist’ gives new meaning to 'music buff'

"The Soloist" (PG-13)
Grade: A-

“The Soloist” is one of those movies. You can tell just by watching the trailers that it’s one that warms and breaks the heart at the same time. It’s a classic tale of one person trying to help another, but that person isn’t sure he wants to be helped. This is not new territory by any means, but “The Soloist” manages to break away from other similar films with clever directing and a cast that is beyond outstanding.

Based on a true story, the film follows Los Angeles Times columnist Steve Lopez (Robert Downy Jr.) as he becomes friends with Nathaniel Ayers (Jamie Foxx), a homeless, schizophrenic street musician who dropped out of Julliard. Lopez and Ayers first meet on the street, where Ayers is playing gorgeous music on a violin that only has two strings.

“I’ve had some setbacks,” Ayers says.

“Me too,” Lopez says as he points to his the right side of his face, which he had recently mangled in a fairly serious biking accident.

Lopez writes a column about Ayers, and a reader sends Ayers a cello after reading about Ayers’ decrepit instrument. With Lopez and Ayers now significant parts of each other’s lives, the film takes off.

Jamie Foxx is easily the highlight of this film, playing the schizophrenic musician role so well it’s almost creepy. His performance is absolutely mesmerizing. He talks so fast that it’s almost impossible to start a coherent conversation with him, and when he hears music he almost looks like he’s about to cry. Tears of joy of course – he digs the musical ecstasy.

The film also goes inside of Ayers’ schizophrenic mind at times, where it sounds like a crowded room where everybody is talking at once.

The role of the troubled Steve Lopez is a natural fit for Robert Downy Jr., as Downy Jr. has had some personal troubles to say the least (he’s been arrested for drugs far too many times to count). Catherine Keener also does a fine job playing Lopez’s ex-wife and coworker.

Director Joe Wright should not be overlooked either. His shots are crafted well and oftentimes quite creative. One of the most fun sequences in the film comes when the reader sends the cello to the Los Angeles Times. The camera then rides around the newsroom in the mail cart with the cello until it eventually reaches Lopez’s desk.

However, the most unique sequence in the film is the synesthesia sequence Wright chooses to include when Lopez and Ayers attend a full orchestra performance. (Synesthesia is a neurological phenomenon where what is experienced in one sense spills over into another. An example is seeing colors when one hears music – this is the type appears in the film. It kind of looks like an iTunes visualization.) The colors dance across the screen as the music permeates the air, implying that Ayers sees such colors when he hears music.

Don’t be surprised if “The Soloist” picks up a few awards at some point. The cast and crew nail this one out of the park.

‘The Wrestler’ DVD features great film, not much else

"The Wrestler" DVD (NR)
Grade: B

Yes, Mickey Rourke is back again to kick some ass, this time as a professional wrestler in the film titled, well, “The Wrestler.” Also, since it’s out now on DVD, you can watch Rourke beat the piss out of people from the comfort of you couch. Now that’s entertainment.

The film follows old fart trailer trash professional wrestler Randy “The Ram” Robinson, who, after spending two decades in the “fake” business of professional wrestling, is starting to fall apart at the seams. While the matches may be staged, they are very physically demanding, and the wrestlers sometimes secretly cut themselves with razor blades to make it appear as if they are getting injured from the fight.

The film follows Randy as he prepares for the restaging of a 20-year-old historic match. Along the way, he shoots steroids, dyes the roots of his long hair blond, goes to the tanning salon and gets a few lap dances from his favorite stripper (played by Marisa Tomei) at the strip club. Everything seems to go wrong on the road to the big match, and Randy starts to realize just how much of a pounding his body has taken. In an odd way, it’s a coming of age film.

Viewers can’t help but feel sorry for Randy as he struggles to continue doing the only thing he knows (wrestling), and the extreme realism of the film showcases what life is most likely actually like for a professional wrestler. He is forced to work at a grocery store part time to pay the bills, he lives in a trailer park, he is littered with scars and he wears a hearing aid. It’s a tremendously gripping story that doesn’t let up until the closing credits.

Rourke, a professional boxer, easily makes this film a huge success, and it almost seems as if he didn’t have to act much for the role. (Even Randy’s theme song is the same as Rourke’s was.) Rourke has a history of making stupid career moves – he turned down major roles “Rain Man,” “Silence of the Lambs,” “Pulp Fiction” and “The Untouchables” to instead star alongside Jean-Claude Van Damme in “Double Team” and in Enrique Iglesias’ “Hero” music video – but he seems to have made the right choice here.

The only major letdown of this DVD is the lack of special features. There are none whatsoever on the standard edition DVD, and to get any, you will have to hunt down a copy of the two-disc special edition that sells for around $30 to $40. But if you don’t care about special features and can stomach some blood (not literally), this one is definitely worth checking out.